This morning I received a message from someone I had not heard from in a long time. I found myself reflecting on my life, as I was honouring the events in hers. Just taking the time to be with that person in reflection, and honouring her life, and then bringing my attention back to my own life.
Wow... I am blessed... as she has been.
I may not have everything in order or in place yet...and there are some areas of my life that have been a bit of a dung heap from time to time.
However... all in all - when I reflect on my life - I have been, and I am, so blessed. I feel this sense of awe at just how much of my life is so rich in so many ways.
I really have been helped by so many people. This means that a lot of people have taken time and effort to put into me... to help me... to spend time and energy and money on me. That is amazing.
If they did this - then they must have had a very good reason... this equates to real appreciation of them of me.... I must be deeply loved and honoured. Let's face it - I don't spend a huge amount of time and energy on things that I don't appreciate and respect or honour... so I have to look at this in the same light.
I have lived for all of 49 years now... and I am in pretty good health. I have been through some very rough waters and faced my own death a few times - but I have come through it. I have had wonderful help from incredible people to do this. Many of them I have been able to thank and then there are many whose names I do not know, whose faces I have not seen and I never will. Thank you.
I have beautiful children... not just my own - but 4 step children, 3 grand children, and then others I have "adopted" along the way. Each one of them have brought with them such rich experiences in my life. Each one of them has taught me so much and each one has given me so much joy. Thank you.
Each person who has come into my life has given me gifts of experience that have enriched me in so many ways - making me into the person I am now. I could not have learned the lessons I have and enriched my life the way it has been enriched without all these beautiful souls coming into my life.(Even though at the time I may well not have been able to see that soul beauty!!!)
Yes - at times some of these experiences have been very painful, and very difficult - however - the end result of all of that - has been gold. In this moment - right now - I am living an incredible life... and without all these experiences - it would not be like this.
The harder parts have been my drivers... the things that have propelled me with great force into a direction I may never have ventured or found the courage to take.
The beautiful parts have left me touched to my soul with just how perfect this life really is, and can be.
All have taught me what is important to me in my life...and to honour that what I find important does not need to be the same thing that someone else finds important.... and that is ok.
These things have taught me to fine tune my focus and to open myself to the experiences I really want to have more of in my life. I am so grateful - thank you.
I am also learning that this feeling of gratitude opens my heart, it opens my mind, my soul and my arms....and this is the position on all levels - for receiving... more... of that which I love.
I love where I live... I am really learning to love this funny quirky house I live in... and the more I do - the more it really falls into place and works for us.
I am learning to live and let live... to be ok with the idea that not everyone will love the same things I do - and not everyone will want the same things from life that I do - and that is also ok.... it does not make us wrong or right - just allows us the freedom to choose different life experiences. We don't even need to share the same space... and in fact - as we make our choices - we may never meet.... and that is ok too.
This is all giving me a huge sense of peace - and I am so grateful for that.
I have learned that if I want something different from someone I used to be close with - and they don't want those things - its ok to let them move closer to what they want and for me to move closer to what I was - because in the end - we will both get what we want....and that is good...that is a win win as both move towards what they want and feel for-fulled one way or another. Thank you....more peace.
When I contemplate all these things - even the little things - like running water - which to us may be little - but to someone in a place that does not have it - ... its huge..... I feel a huge sense of expansion. Thank you.
For the flowers in my garden , and the birds who visit here.... wow... how beautiful... life is here and its vibrant - and as I tune into that - I catch it and my own vibration lifts and I begin to feel more alive and more vibrant. Thank you.
For the stranger in the street who looks up and into my eyes and smiles... thank you... you lift my heart as I see softness and love in the crazy business that can be city life. I see you too - thank you.
Take time to look at your life today - and to reflect back... look at how much help there has been for you. Look at how much support you really have received. Think back to all the people who are involved in putting a pen together for you so that you can write. Think about all the people who are involved in you being able to read my words today... and how amazing it is that we can share like this....
Thank you - to all those unseen and unacknowledged people out there in the world who are making this connection possible.
Just take the time to really feel this and acknowledge - that even though we have our bad times... and sometimes those can be hell and feel like they are going n forever.... there has been love for us... there has been support for us.... there still is.... the sun is in the sky warming us - giving us light... the earth is beneath our feet... supporting us and giving us nourishment.... the birds sing their songs of joy and remind us that there are things to be in awe of - to love - to rejoice in... to stop and admire - because when we do - they get a chance to infuse us with their being-ness and share their zest for life with us... and if we let them.. lift us up.
And what about the misery we see - the pain and the senselessness.... they inspire us to take action - to change....to reach for what is better. Thank you.