Have you ever found yourself wondering ..."What is the point of life?"
To me - after so much soul searching... and searching everywhere else... it has come to mean - to be more me - to live my life in as much fullness of expression of me as I can - and to get happy.
All the books I have read... all the courses I have been on - they all point to this... be who I am...and be happy with that - and just get happy.
I see how much pressure I have put myself in in the past... do this ...do that.. please this one...please that one.... and really - it did not make any difference to those people in the long term. You cannot make someone else happy... not really. You can appease them with your actions etc... and you can lift them up with good things... but you can't make them feel happy - its something they do for themselves... they decide to allow happiness in.
Yes - I do love to do things that bring a smile to people...but why do I do those things?? I do them because actually - it makes me feel good inside... it brings me great joy... so see how much me there is in this??
Am I doing it to make them happy? Yes - in part - because I love to see someone smile... I love joy and I love to spread it and infect people with it... but - like all infections - it can't get in unless that person wants to let it in. Our defenses have to be down to let something in.
If a door is closed and bolted shut... you can put in huge effort to smash it down... but in many cases - all you get is a massive bruised and painful arm!
So if this applies to others - of course it applies to me too.
If my door is closed and bolted shut - nothing is going to get in until I LET IT IN!!!!!!
So its time to check my doors... all those internal doors and external walls.
Have I got huge high walls of resistance around me? Are some of them called Worry? Doubt? Self hatred? Lack of self worth? Lack of deserve-ability? All of these things are blockers and they stop the good stuff of life from coming in - they block happiness, and love. They act like beaters - raining misery down on my back.
They can stop me from achieving success - because if I have those blockers in the way and they are active - then our comes good old sabotage to mess things up... "You can't have this... you have not done this or that!!!" "You can't be happy ,because Tom is not happy!!!" "Blah Blah Blah..."
These are just more stories we have brought into, to stop ourselves from getting or having what we want.
The sun shines regardless of how many clouds are in the sky. These blockers are like those clouds in the sky... the good stuff - as in the sun - is out there - constantly... but - we can cloud over and block it - or we can blow those clouds away and let the good stuff in and start to feel better immediately...regardless of what else is going on in the world. Yes.. sometimes we need to go through expressions to wash those clouds and misery away - but... then... we can stop and breathe and reconnect to the sunshine of life again... its there!!!
Somehow - when I do let go of the "stuff" that is bothering me... either by just dropping it, changing focus, or expressing the stuff.... then I find that calm clear space - and start to breathe, and then the sun starts to shine again (even on a cloudy day)... and I can find that spot of warmth inside myself - and out there in the world.. its starts to reflect it back at me.... and life gets better... and just keeps on getting better...because that is why I am here.. to be me.... and to be happy!